Doa. Doa. Doa.
This post was first published on August 1, 2015 on one of my older blogs. Decided to repost it here at Her Little Guilty Pleasures due to reasons that I mentioned in this post.
If you happened to follow me on Twitter, you must know that I have been feeling so negative for the past week. So, to change my mood a little bit, I decided to write this post. I have to remind myself that despite all the bad things that are happening in my life right now, Allah still loves me. He answered to my desperate prayers, and He still answers to my prayers. Sesungguhnya Allah itu maha pengasih lagi maha penyayang.
I have been praying for this specific things since I was in Form 3. Boleh dikatakan tiap-tiap hari berdoa untuk this thing sampailah awal tahun ni. Then, I stopped. Why? Simply because Allah has finally answered my prayer. It took me almost 7 years to get the answer. It was not the answer that I wanted yet I was happy. Simply because I know Allah knows best! :)
I'm so thankful that He answered my prayer after 7 years. I'm so thankful He didn't answer my prayer as soon as I prayed for it. Allah tak kabulkan doa saya semasa saya masih lagi muda remaja. He answered my prayer when I am a little bit mature. I'm at the age where I know how to handle frustration a little bit wisely.
This is what I always say to my housemate regarding my prayer for this specific thing.
"Sedih juga sebab kita tunggu 7 tahun baru dapat jawapan. Dah tu, bukan jawapan yang kita nak. Tapi, alhamdulillah, nasib baik Allah jawab doa tu sekarang. At least, kita dah kuat sikit. At least, kita dah matang sikit. Takdelah nak frust menonggeng sangat ke apa ke. Kita pun busy sekarang. Takde masa nak bersedih sangat. Kalaulah Allah jawab doa kita awal sangat, mungkin takdelah kita yang sekarang ni kot. Tak sampai Canada agaknya kita kalau Allah jawab doa kita awal sikit."
Update in 2019: Masya Allah, I can't believe it's almost 4 years since this happened. Am still so grateful that He answered my prayers 4 years ago :)
I have been praying to be given a chance to meet this one person. It felt almost impossible to meet this said person. Tapi, itulah. Nothing is impossible for Allah. I guess I was desperate enough that Allah granted my prayer almost instantaneously. I got my first chance to meet and talk to this person but I wasted the chance as I was not fully prepared for it. Nak jumpa sangat tapi bila dah ada peluang, tak guna betul-betul pula. Rasa macam bodah sangat pun ada sebab kita tak tahu kan bila kita akan dapat peluang macam ni lagi. But what to do, eh? I was such a chicken.
Walaupun sedih sebab mensia-siakan peluang pertama, masih lagi terus berdoa agar dapat peluang sekali lagi. Then, I got my second chance after 6 days. Although I was not fully prepared to meet and talk to this person, alhamdulillah, I just grabbed the opportunity and fully utilized it. Alhamdulillah, everything went so well. In fact, I felt so privileged after I talked to this person.
So Farah, this too shall pass. Whatever that make you feel so negative will pass, Farah. Allah will not impose on any self more than it can stand. He loves you! Remember, He answered to your most desperate prayers. And He still showers you with His endless blessings :)