Saturday, October 07, 2017

On Starting Anew & Challenging Myself

Am writing this post to remind myself that I actually started doing something for the betterment of my life after going through a long dark period. 

Some of you might have been wondering where did I go for the past one year. I rarely appeared online. I stopped updating my previous blog (and eventually closed the blog down) and Instagram. Basically, I left my virtual life hanging. I received few comments and DMs from other bloggers asking about my whereabouts which I unintentionally ignored. Sorry for that and thank you so much for showing that you care :)

Honestly, I did not go anywhere. I was exactly in my place but at the dark corner of it. I was struggling emotionally and mentally due to the changes that happened in my life. I am not ready to go into the details yet but the essence of the dark feelings revolved mainly around my failure to get a decent job in Malaysia and the struggle to readapt myself with Malaysia.

I knew how dangerous those feeling were, so I decided to come back to Canada despite getting resistance from my family, initially. It might not be the best decision as I might experience those feelings again in the future but at least, this decision that I made provided me with some temporary comfort while I am looking for another permanent solution.



When I decided to come back to Canada, I told myself that I will not allow myself to feel that way again. As such, I have decided to take few new challenges in order to give my life a new life and to celebrate the new start. Some of the challenges that I decided to embrace are; 
  • to revisit my hafazan
  • to lose weight
  • to learn how to use chopsticks
  • to do something that I am uncomfortable doing 
  • to learn how to read Hangul
  • to gain new sets of skill and knowledge
  • to read more English books
just to name a few. These challenges might seem small to other people but they are really big for me. These are things that I put a hold on from doing for years just because I'm afraid of the failure and to step out from my comfort zone or I don't feel like doing it or I'm just plain lazy. 

The progress of embracing these challenges has been somewhat encouraging. I know I can do better but I like to remind myself that it is okay not to rush things and it is okay if I have hiccups along the way. Some of the progress that I have made;
  • My hafazan are slowly coming back to me
  • I have lost nearly 6 kg - I think altitude played a big role here. haha!
  • I can somewhat use chopsticks now. I can even use Korean chopsticks to eat banchan.
  • I am currently working in a position where I need to do all sort of stuff that I am not comfortable doing.
  • I finally have memorized all the Hangul characters! :D
I guess, cheers to the new start and challenges? :)

p.s: Would appreciate a prayer from you. May Allah ease everything for us. Insya Allah :)

12 comments:

  1. wow lost 6 kg! perubahan yg ketara tu :D mesti sebab banyak berjalan jugak ni

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    Replies
    1. Tak nampak pun perubahan tu so sometimes I don't believe that I actually lost 6kg.

      &

      Tak banyak berjalan pun sebab masa tidur tu dah tunggang terbalik :( But I started to go to gym at least half an hour every day. Hahahaha. #thingsidojusttolosesomeweight

      Delete
  2. dear.. where ever you are do take care okay ? its okay to be lost once in a while but we have to find ways to stand back on our feet again. yes i totally understand the situation (at this age.. i still cannot secure myself a decent job) still contract and contract so i do understand you. but !! it doesnt give up the ticket to stay down forever. cherish your time darling. you still have a long way to go.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much, kak Siti! I will, insya Allah :)

      I'm currently feeling good and okay right now. Have decided to enjoy the moment instead of worrying about the future too much and lamenting my dark past.

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  3. We have almost the same goal. Skang ni tengah gigih looking back on the hafazan. Hafal mana yg lupa etc. And try to lose more weight. I love reading your blog sampai leka. Sincerely, your new blog follower :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. All the best for you too! Thanks for dropping by and following this humble blog.

      I have been your silent reader since a year ago, I think? :)

      Delete
  4. hahahaha...best of luck in achieving all! :D

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  5. Omgg seriously dekat 6kg hilang? Waaaa jeles. Hahaha! Take care dekat sana :)

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